Potty Training : The grand finale

I started my potty adventures here and here when Josiah was about 2.5 year old.  But it is only since last week when I finally declare him truly potty trained.  It only took me like ONE YEAR!!!

Is this normal?  Am I a failure?  Well, I sure do feel like one especially since we were stuck with the whole poo problem for quite a while....

 "Josiah can tell you when he needs a wee and has not had an accident; day or night.  He can tell you when he needs a poo but refuses to use the toilet.  Go figure!!  Anyone with similar predicament out there, please, please help me out.  My latest plan of hiding his supplies of nappies and telling him and showing him that we have run out of nappies ended in major disaster.  Two days of holding it in, one screaming boy and one very painful exit was enough for me to lay this matter to rest for some time again.  We both needed to chill out about it and erase the bad memories associated with it before trying out anything again.  "  

In theory, Josiah would be able to tell you that nappies were for "babies" and he is a "big boy" but when the time comes, with tears in his eyes, he'd say that he is a baby so he can have a nappy.  We even upped the game by promising him blue scooter if he manages to do it in the potty for one week.  For one whole month, he would correctly tell anyone that he would get a scooter if he poop in the potty.  Yet, at the crucial moment, tears accompanies his pleas for a nappy.  It was so frustrating for me especially since I could not establish what exactly he was afraid of.  I tried asking him so many times but he could not verbalise his fears.  

Then, one Tuesday morning, when he was about to go - I told him that he could have the nappy but he has to sit on the potty WITH the nappy.  Or he could just sit on the potty without the nappy.  His choice.  He cried and protested, I repeated my terms hoping that at least I could get him to sit on potty whilst he was pooping in the nappy.  Josiah surprised me by choosing to sit WITHOUT the nappy ??!! And just like that - he did it!!!

I gave him the whole kisses/praises/high fives/hugs and of course a promise to get his scooter.  On Wednesday, we had an outing planned and I told Josiah that we could then give baby all of his nappies since he was a big boy now.  He heartily agreed and it was done.  I did not know it then but a more sinister twist to this whole potty business was just about to begin.  Thereafter, Josiah refused to use the potty, choosing to hold it in and telling me that he has ALREADY used the potty ie in his head - he only has to use it ONCE.

I kept explaining to him that everyone needs to poo everyday...etc and having to repeat the whole "big boy" story again.  Even threat to return his scooter did not help.  He also refuses to use the nappy.  At that point, he was holding it in for three.whole.days at a time!!  My lowest point being one afternoon when Shaun and I spent 2 hours trying to persuade him to use the potty with no avail.  He sat on the potty, he cried, he screamed, he was given more liquids, he sat and nothing. Nothing at all.  He fell asleep on the sofa exhausted from the whole thing.  When he woke, he jump up and went to the potty and did it.   This horrible pattern continued for another week.  He would hold it in as long as he could before literally jumping into the potty for 5 seconds.  That night, I prayed to God to take away his fears and the following morning, he went on his own and have been going ever since.  

Basically, he does not like to be told to poo.  So now even when I see him doing the "holding-in dance", I just ignore it and hope that he chooses to go soon.  Sometimes he does and sometimes he succeeds in holding it in and will only go when he cannot hold it anymore.  My little stubborn boy! 

Bye bye nappies!!!!  

My big boy

June 2010: A rough month indeed...

I have pondered over whether to post about my recent ordeal here, in Josiah's blogworld and concluded that it is something that I want to remember in years to come.

About 4 years ago, when I was on the doctor's office getting my first ultrasound (because my period was late), our joy at seeing tiny Josiah was overshadowed by a 10cm cyst on my right ovary.  Seeing that I had conveniently 'forgotten' to go for a gynae checkup before getting married - I was devastated.  I blamed myself for not catching this cyst earlier and now it is too late.  I am with child and the doctor refuses to operate until at least 3-4 months into pregnancy.  I was upset mainly because I wanted the cyst removed as soon as possible before I could bond with my baby.  I know I would not be able to deal with the guilt if I lost the baby.  Since Doctor #1 refused to operate, I scheduled an appointment with another doctor on a Saturday to get a second opinion.  That same week, I was swamped at work with getting the team ready for auditors inspections.  My stress levels were sky high and it did not help that I had to worry about cyst and my baby too.  Early Friday morning, I woke up to pee and when I got back to bed, a dull pain started.  As I continued to lie in bed, I knew something was wrong, the pain was getting worse.  I woke Shaun up and we rushed to the hospital, I was in so much pain that I could not stand straight and was vomiting from the intensity of the pain.  Hours later, Doctor #1 informed us that the cyst had twisted and caused all that pain.  According to Doctor #1, if I chose not to operate that day, I would have to risk such pain whenever the cyst twisted around.  But if I went ahead with the surgery, I would risk losing baby who was just about 6 weeks old at that time.  We prayed about it and went ahead with surgery.  It was horrible coming out from surgery but my baby was still with me. So I was on bedrest for the rest of my first trimester.  I was given hormone pills to keep baby happy and told not to walk / sit - just lie down lots.  It was super BORING but it worked.  I went back to work after that and went on to have the most text book pregnancy and delivery!

Fast forward till end of last year, I noticed that I am needing to go toilet frequently again.  Had a hunch that something was up and did not want to repeat my mistake again.  I went to get an ultrasound and saw that same dark spot again on the screen.  This time is was about 6cm on the left ovary and there was another one on the right ovary but not as big.  Consultant gynae advised to get it removed immediately but I was not keen on surgery especially with no one around to help me look after Josiah.  So hatching this whole big plan involving flying my parents to London and timing the surgery two days after their arrival!  So on 2nd June, Shaun and I walked - yes, you read correctly, walked to St Mary's Hospital and waited for the doctor to operate.  It was strange because nurses came round to ask how I am - fine, more that fine, I feel great...my parents are here...the sun is shining....so why am I subjecting myself to this ordeal again?  Shaun would remind me that living with it is like living with a bomb inside me.  Nice. Thanks.

Anyway, the doctor was 2 hours late and I was starving since I am not able to eat or drink anything from the night before.  I was nervous but yet wanting it to be over so I could go home.  This time I remembered to let the anaesthetist know that I am very sensitive so could she please not over-drug me...she did a great job.  And I did need very little drug to get me to la-la land.  I remember her talking to me as she drugged my up and next thing I know, it was 2 hours gone by, and it is over.  Now the nasty bit - as usual, I was shivering and shaking from the drugs.  Then as I tried to drink some water, nausea hit me - HARD.  I could not keep fluids down and 3 hours later, am still stuck in recovery room.  As night fell, the nurse started hinting that I should move on with it.  Or decide to stayover.  In hindsight, I should have just stayed the night because my first night at home was horrible.  I had pain all over my body and kept waking up from the pain even with strong painkillers. My tummy was bloated from the surgery and I had to resort to my pregnant clothes.

It took another 2 weeks before I could walk more without pain and a further 2 weeks before I was back to normal.  By this time, Josiah was in the midst of his chicken pox episode.  Yes, it was such good timing.  Josiah broke out in red spots but was generally quite happy. He had spots on his back, tummy, scalp, fingers and probably his mouth.  He called them "moles" and was quite proud to show us all his spots.  Putting calamine lotion on him was tough because he kept saying it was too cold.   We kept him home for 2 weeks.  He was mainly playing with my Dad the whole day.  Mum and I even managed to sneak in a few shopping trips in between so everyone was happy.  And to top that off, we even managed two short weekend breaks to Wales and Stratfordyums!

So despite the rough start, June 2010 ended quite nicely.  

Dinner at Stratford Hotel - Indian food for the gals, fish & chips for the guys!

Rose garden at Warwick Castle

Chicken Pox galore!! Big one on the nose :)

Itchy, itchy....

Week 2: My "moles"are disappearing