When will I see you again?

I have consciously been avoiding having to blog these past few weeks. Why? Because I am feeling a bit down and I am just so L.O.S.T.

Lost, feeling lost, losing my mind.... you get the picture. To clarify and maybe help you understand, let's see... My in-laws went home after 6 weeks, then my parents left after being with us for 4 weeks. Josiah is not making a lot of progress in potty training and I have had to spend every morning in nursery trying to get him to like it. I just struggling with all the changes and having to put on a "it's okay" face for Josiah whilst feeling absolutely crap inside. I have difficulty falling asleep and yet hate to have to wake up to face the reality in the morning. Crazy, crazy time for me.

The pain mainly in having to send Josiah to nursery and seeing him screaming and crying every.single.day. It breaks my heart and is just as painful for me to turn my back and walk away calmly. I know it will get better but really wished that it would "get better" sooner. It makes it harder for both of us too knowing that this nursery is not the right one for us. The nursery itself is wonderful with a huge sandpit and playground, lots of different types of toys...etc But the staff there, my goodness, they all look so uptight and unfriendly. No one really talks to the kids there, no smiles, no laughter.....even their singing session is depressing. The teacher puts on a tape and holds up a book to show the kids. She does not sing, the kids are not encouraged to sing....my goodness, what is the point of a singing session. His assigned key-worker is cold and unfriendly. She is always in a rush to go for her "break time" and leaves the nursery before I can even ask her about Josiah. Enough said. I have made the decision to change nursery today and I hope the next nursery would be better for the both of us.

In the mean time, I am going to enjoy our time together again, going to playgroups together. I know that Josiah would love nursery when he meets with the right key person with the right attitude. He is so easy going and loves to be around other kids so this step of independence is quite due. Plus, I am hoping that he would gain from being with other kids around meal time and learn to feed himself. He is the only nearly three year old I know who still does not self feed and it is beginning to bug me. I love to feed him (which ensures that he actually eats) but I know that it is time for him to learn this new skills which I have failed to impart to him. I am not a good mum when it comes to thing like this and here I am trying to delegate it to the good people at his nursery :p

Typical. When the going gets tough, the tough gets a "helper". Hehehehe....

Happier times - group photo in Bruge, Belgium

Potty Training : A New Potty

Folks, I have never been one to advocate buying expensive stuff especially for kids. But this whole potty business has gotten me potty in the head as well, so I placed an order for a nicer potty that is more like a child seat with a removable portion at the bottom. When the potty arrived - Josiah was all excited about it and had a wee in it the first time he used it!!! He was so excited about taking out the bottom part and pouring it in the big potty. As a reward, he gets to flush and wash his hands (something that I never let him do otherwise!). Well, that was a couple of days ago and today, he finally told me he needed to use the potty. I was so shocked that I literally dropped everything to rush him to the potty. We had TWO request to use the potty today and a few wee-ing on demand. I am on a potty-high and decided that I should also try to bake some cupcakes for the first time. Those who know me will read this with jaws open as I NEVER bake, I have been quite adamant about buying desserts whenever I feel like it. Of course, it does help that my mum-in-law left all the ingredients and baking utensils behind with hopes that I'd pick it up one day. So here it is, my first cupcake using the famous Hummingbird cupcake recipe. Let's hope it turns out okay.

And for Josiah - Mummy is so proud of you! It is a big step for you and I am glad that we did it together. I hope you would remember this and one day come back to Mummy for help / advice knowing that I will endevour to do everything I can so you can succeed in anything you put your mind to.

Cupcake anyone?

Potty time! Day 2 & 3

Feeling disheartened and wanting to go out, I have decided to try the potty training in the morning till whenever I feel like going out which is usually after 1pm. In Day 2, I decided to let him run around without pants at all with hopes of catching him in action and pointing out to him that it is called a "wee wee" and that he CAN control it if he wants to. Despite having Grandpa around to help me watch him and try to catch him before he wee on the floor, we failed miserably. Not one drop in the potty and lots of Dettol floor wipe action instead! We went out for lunch to reward all the adults for trying :)



Day 3 started out well, I had a nice talk to him telling him about how he will get a lollipop if he manages to wee in the potty. I managed to get Josiah to sit for really long time on his potty but guess what? He just did not have to wee at all. From 9am till 1pm he was dry and just as I put him on his highchair for lunch, the dam broke and it was like Niagaria Falls at the dining table. Out came the Dettol again. It is nearly 4pm now and he has just sat on the potty for 30 minutes and not one drop. Frustrated at this, I put on his nappy and got down to the laptop. It is super tiring looking at his little "koo koo" for so many hours hoping to catch a little sign that he is about to wee. I have never looked at it for so long before. Ever. The problem is that he does not drink a lot of water and he has never been a fan of water, getting his water from milk and soups only. I have to make sure he has more water to drink tomorrow.

Toddlerhood: The Next Frontier

"I can't see Daddy anywhere" said Josiah this morning as we are heading out to church.

Wow, his first proper sentence.

Instead of answering him, I looked at him wondering how I once was in awe when he said his first word. Nowadays, his vocabulary is growing and his quirky remarks really makes my day.

I know one day, I will look back on this and moan about how he cannot stop talking but for now - I want to savour this warm fuzzy feeling I get whenever I hear him talk.

His other achievements include:

• Able to sing Twinkle, twinkle, ABC song, Incy Wincy Spider, Little Einstein song
• Able to count from 1 to 12
• Able to identify most colours
• Able to identify most alphabets
• Able to read a few words like dog, cat, duck, frog, horse, pig, chicken, Josiah, Mommy, Daddy, Thomas, Percy, star, car, Harold, James.
• Able to do some simple puzzles
• Able to paint and draw and colour quite well

Ahhh....but of course, I must also remember the things he is still struggling with, which includes:

• Not able to walk down steps on his own, he can walk up with help
• Not able to jump or climb too well
• Not able to feed himself with a spoon properly
• Not able to remove his socks or shoes on his own
• Not able to eat pasta, pizza, most veggies and fruits
• Not potty trained

I am looking forward to his independence which I think will improve when he starts nursery in September. He will be going for 3 mornings and although it will be a welcome break for me, I am honestly dreading that day. I want my freedom yet don't want to be away from him. Get it? Nope....well, I don't get it too. Such a strange mix of feelings which I believe only another full time SAHM will understand.

Does he miss his baby stuff too?

Josiah in Prague

Potty time! Day 1

Alas, I succumbed to pressures from everyone to start potty training. I am not bothered that Josiah is still in diapers, come on, he is only 2.... what's the hurry? My parents, in-laws, friends and even Shaun has been pestering me about it. To me, being potty trained is not as cut out as a lot of people think. People think that once the child is potty trained, then they don't have to change nappies anymore. But from what I observed, once potty trained, you'd have to bring even MORE stuff. From travel potty, to change of clothes - and not to mention those crazy, stressful moments when you are on the train and the kid suddenly wants to go potty....!!!#&**!!



At the moment, Josiah gets a change of diaper in the morning after he poos. Then another one in late afternoon and one before sleep. No fuss, no mess....I can go out with him the whole day without having to keep track of time because I know he has a diaper on. Without the diaper, the onus is on the parent to remind the child if he/she wants to go potty. Then parent (usually the mother) will have to find toilet and bring child to toilet quickly. How stressful is that? Add to that the scenario when an "accident" occurs when you are outside. Goodness me, I would be throwing out a lot of pants at this rate because I cannot imagine having to wash out poo from his pants. Blech....yucks....can I delegate this portion of motherhood to anyone else? Anyone else??? Help!!!



Back to Josiah's potty training, we started out with me putting him on potty. He sat for 5 minutes and then wriggled to get out despite me trying to keep him on longer. He proceeded to wet his pants 5 minutes later. After a change, I reminded myself to ask him to go potty in another 15 minutes, but he had another wet pants before then. By lunchtime, he'd wet 4 pair of pants and had one tantrum because I was asking him to sit on the potty. I also had to ban him from sitting on the sofa or our bed - see how cruel this potty training is..... Mental note to myself to get some blankets for the sofa. Sigh. I am not happy at all.


Just before his nap, I put a nappy on and all was well for the rest of the evening. Shaun is not well and I just couldn't cope with two upset boys. Will try again tomorrow morning.


The upside to this exercise: Saved ONE piece of nappy today. Yay. =.=

Wordless Wednesday: Josiah is 2.5 years old!

Perfect

With Shaun's parents here, our life has significantly improved, in fact, is close to perfect. Josiah is having a lovely time with his Grandpa and Grandma, Mummy is getting a break for Josiah and Daddy is free to do anything when he gets home from work.

The question is now, with all the free time, what happened to the blog? No post since June....

Well.....the answer in two words : SUMMER SALES

We have been out shopping almost every other day, scouting for bargains and indulging in some well earned retail therapy. All the boys in the household suffer from the retail therapy in their own ways.

Shaun is getting poorer everyday but at least he is not being dragged around looking at clothes, kitchenware and shoes. shoes. shoes.... In fact, he is probably the least affected, managing to escape this shopping horror by staying in the office earning more money for me :)

Grandpa is by far the most worst off - having to follow the ladies around, helping with carrying stuff, then being left to entertain Josiah whilst we shop and then having to pay for the damages. Not very nice.

Meanwhile, Josiah learnt early on how to deal with this whole shopping ordeal by asking for milk the moment we get into a shopping place and settling in his buggy with his favourite "chow chow" cloth and daydreaming of a better place. Possibly a better mother too.